As the new year started, so did my list of books I wanted to read. Check out that post – and be sure to tell me the amazing ones I am surely missing!
Unbelievably, the first book I have finished is actually the first on my list! Now, this usually NEVER happens! I have a tendency to start one book, then hear about a new one, and leave the first on a pile on my nightstand…
Not this time. This time, I did it – and I’m really happy I did!
Sacred Influence: How God Uses Wives to Shape the Souls of Their Husbands
I started reading this book a few months ago, after hearing about it at a women’s gathering at church. My friends recommended it as a great reference for how God calls us to be supportive of our spouse. This book is truly about how you can have a better relationship with your husband. And, while wives are definitely the main target audience, I can also see how a husband could also benefit from this book. (After all, guys, wouldn’t it help you get your needs better understood – and met – if someone had already voiced them?!?)
It was one of those books that I really wanted to sit down and just read through because there was so much good information. But, I really took my time in order to work on implementing Thomas’s suggestions and studying out the biblical principles presented throughout the book, and am really happy I did.
While there are definitely strategies for couples to put into play when they are having difficulties in their marriages, there are also some really good, basic principles that all married couples should follow as part of their daily lives. The one that hit me hardest involved prayers of gratitude for my husband.
Prayers of Gratitude
In one of my earlier posts, I wrote about how finding joy starts with just one thing. It is the same with gratitude. You only need one thing to get you started ~ and then you’re off and running.
I can usually come up with a whole list of ways I am grateful for who Brad is and what he does – not just for me, but for our family, our church family, our extended family, our friends, strangers he doesn’t even know… well, you get the idea.
But, if I’m having a hard day and the reasons I am grateful for my husband aren’t coming as easily, I just need to think of one thing. I thank God for my husband for that one thing, and the next thing I know, the myriad reasons I love and am grateful for my husband start pouring out of my heart.
Now, I know that not everyone feels as grateful for their spouse as I do for Brad. So, stop shaking your head and rolling your eyes at me as you mutter something under your breath about how you couldn’t come up with one thing if somebody paid you and this is all just impossible (or something along those lines) and pay close attention to this next part from the book:
Prayers of thankfulness literally form our soul.
Stop and read that again.
Prayers of thankfulness literally form our soul.
That hit me like a ton of bricks. I had never thought about it like that before. Who doesn’t want their soul formed by being grateful and thankful?!? Just imagine how happy we could be and the joy we could find in even the smallest of things!
Thomas went on to say that these types of prayers groom our affections. Just think if you were to stretch your very hardest and work really hard at finding that one thing and then pray to God thanking Him for that in your spouse. How could that hurt? More importantly, how could that help?
To think that by praying these prayers of gratitude, my soul is formed. That is so encouraging to me! Just through adding this one piece to my prayers, I have found I am more loving towards my husband. I am more supportive of him and what he does. I am slower to get frustrated and angry with him for the little things. And, most importantly, I am able to see more and more things for which I can be grateful.
It all comes back to Paul and his instructions on what we should be focused on at all times…
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. (Philippians 4:8, NIV)
And, to think, Paul wrote that verse while in prison. If he could find so many things for which to be thankful even in his situation, perhaps it isn’t too big of a stretch to find that one thing about a spouse to pray for in thanksgiving. Not only would that foster feelings of gratitude and, hopefully, joy, but it could also have a very positive impact on the soul in the process…
Your Thoughts
How about you? How do you pray for your spouse? What verses have you found that have helped you find your one thing? I can’t wait to hear from all of you and read your stories of grateful hearts and souls being formed!
